Buy Two Get One Free

So Rewind to June 2013. We had been debating the 3rd kid thing for a few months. Well, lets be honest. I was debating the 3rd kid thing. My husband wasn't exactly on board, but if it was something that would complete my life he would at least have the discussion. We were actually on vacation in Florida with our kids, staying at "our beach house" as Grayson likes to call it. (I wish it was the truth son, but your stuff costs too much) The boys were exhausted and in bed and we were taking a few minutes to sit around and talk. Just what he loves. (Okay, he does love to talk, but probably not about more kids). He finally came out and said that he was perfectly fine with 2. I thought maybe he had been a little more on the fence where I was, but maybe that was wishful thinking. After a couple days of thinking over our discussion I finally came to the conclusion that I was happy. I was totally happy with my two fantastic boys. And they are boys. Energetic. Love to be on the go and in the dirt. Totally opposite of my calm self.

September 2013. There were maybe a couple weeks where we had any chance at getting pregnant. Knowing that I had always required medication to ovulate with the first two kids I wasn't terribly worried. My doctor has always told me that just because I needed medicine with the first two didn't mean that I NEVER ovulated. Just that I didn't regularly. Knowing this I purchased some ovulation test kits just to be sure that nothing was going to happen without me being aware of it. Negative tests. After several days of this I felt a little bloated and just not right so I figured I would just call the clinic and ask for a refill prior to my appointment. After all the testing we have been through, I knew she would ask if I had taken a pregnancy test since before she would refill it. So I did just that. At 11:00 on a Wednesday night. The pregnant line appeared before the one that is always there, in less than the 3 minutes you are supposed to wait. WHAT??? HOW ON EARTH COULD THAT BE?? So after several minutes of a rapid heartbeat and sitting in the bathroom I made my way across the house and just sat the test next to my husband. And sat down. I think he had the same reaction as I did. It took a few seconds before he even said anything. Guess that joke I've had for years about "Buy Two, Get one Free when we are 40" was essentially true. Luckily we aren't 40 yet. Thursday morning at work I was still in shock. Then I open an email from my coworker "I dreamed last night that you and I were both pregnant" I practically fell out of the chair. And then I suggested maybe she should go buy herself a pregnancy test.

Pregnancy #3 was a little more of an adventure than the previous ones. My doctor informed me that she thought it was a girl. "Girls cause trouble from day one". I think I complained every day and ate Zofran like candy (within the rules..why didn't anyone tell me about that fantastic medication with the first two?). I had zero desire for food, but apples and starburst (eventually) were pretty good. And I LOVED real Coke. Not the Coke Zero that I usually liked. Diet Everything was out. When the Ultrasound Tech said "Girl". Dusty asked her to repeat it. And to show him how she could tell. We really thought he was 99% Y chromosomes by now. But, "1%" chance of ovulation test being inaccurate and 1% chance we would have a girl both came true. Grayson was at our first Ultrasound as well. When he heard it was a girl "I told you it was a girl. We didn't need to come here today." Of Course we didn't, but we needed visual proof of his predictions. Bring on the Pink. And Purple. (When did I get girly?) 

Baby Girl Weems 16 Weeks

I am not sure, but being pregnant in general, especially with baby #3, brings every evil comment out from people. And seeing as how I deal with lots of strangers on a daily basis they had all kinds of jokes. You have to love "Well you know how this happens by now right?" Of course we do you idiot. And yes it's only one baby. My abdominal muscles are no longer that of a 20 year old girl, but rather an early 30's mother of 2. And I have "healthy-sized" babies. Thanks for making my day. I managed to refrain from being a bitch to everyone. I just cried instead. 

I cried EVERYDAY. Some days it was over something real. Other days it was because the wind blew my dog's hair a little too far to the left. If you know me well, you know that I don't cry. Ever. Well, occasionally when the stress builds up for too long and I shed 2 tears to feel better. I think only one person has ever actually witnessed that.

After a long wait and having to listen to Grayson explain to Braxton that the baby doesn't have a door we can get her out of Mom's tummy through (he was very inpatient while having to wait on this "stister"), we got our girl. Totally Unplanned, but exceptionally loved by everyone. Especially her Brothers. And true to Grayson's request we did not make him come to the hospital and have to see all of mom's guts when they took sister out. (We might have slyly bypassed the story on how babies are actually born)

What, when did I buy a bow like this? I swore no big bows.

One of my Favorites. Hospital gown and all. You can just see how much they love "Stister"

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Life of a Basketball Wife

My husband LOVES basketball. I'm fairly certain that in his dreams at night he thinks he is playing in the NBA. At least he doesn't act them out. Typically he doesn't really sit down to watch many games and if he does he is also working on the computer. (We all know he can't sit still for very long) This year; however, he made a point to either record or watch some of the NBA finals. I'm fine with this, but struggled with trying to figure out why after 11 years of being married he had changed his habit. I will likely never know.

For Father's Day this year I actually had an idea. I wanted to buy a basketball goal. Apparently several months ago when he was pricing them out at Academy I suggested (in my attempt to prevent a purchase that evening) that we look again around Father's Day. I should have known this would be one thing he actually remembered me saying. So when I mentioned I had an idea he quickly asked if it was a basketball goal. I lied. I was irritated that he actually remembered and guessed my idea. But, he believed me so that worked out well. After much thinking, and worrying about planning, I realized that it was unlikely that I could figure out a plan to go buy one and put it together without some serious help. So I just took him shopping.

We went Friday night and he picked out a couple he was interested in, but we determined that it wouldn't fit in the car. Saturday evening we stopped back again and made the big purchase. Never did I know that buying a basketball goal at dinner time would have me awake until after midnight that night. But, it was finished slightly before 1 a.m. He said he couldn't not get where he could actually play before he went to bed that night. Crazy boy. But, he loves basketball.

We have played several times. By play I actually mean shoot hoops. I'm not competitive enough to really play a game. Plus I have to improve to stand a chance at winning, or at least shop for a lower cut tank top to play in. Generally we play after the boys are in bed when its cooler outside. I had forgotten that I actually like to "play". So its a nice "date" some days.

My husband, who is obviously more competitive, plays like he is 15 again. Running, Jumping, Shooting, Attempting to dunk.... you get the idea. Of course the knee pain he had originally was from his shoes ;-) The right shoulder pain started and was blamed on dunking attempts. Then he decided one evening to practice his (rebounding of some name that I can't remember) and tried to make all my missed shots turn into baskets. This really made his shoulder hurt. Of course when 7 a.m. rolled around he blamed it on Braxton thinking he had been lying down funny when Braxton moved to our bed. Braxton was only there for 5 minutes so that was obviously not the real reason. So now I have a husband who can't lift his arm above 90 degrees and he can't lift much weight at all without shooting pain. But, like most husbands, he seems disinterested in letting me work on his shoulder with my PT skills.

We had a basketball date schedule for that night, but I figured that we wouldn't get to play. I was wrong.
"I will just play with my left arm. Its probably more level playing for you anyway"

I guess that's love for me... or likely more for getting to play basketball. Too bad both his shoulders hurt now....

Mothers Know Everything

I meant to write a post for Mother's Day, but I just didn't get around to it. I had a great weekend with my friend Sarah in Dallas. We came back early Sunday morning and the boys spent the rest of the day with me :-)

My mom was/still is a very special person to me. I always knew she worked hard, but until I had kids I never knew how hard. I have a fantastic husband. He is great with the kids. He helps out with them more than I hear most of my friends say their husbands do. How my mom managed with just herself I will never know. I realize that she had my grandparents, but they weren't there every moment. 

My mom was also not known for her fashion sense. I rarely agreed with what she suggested that we buy growing up. Things were always "cool" to her, when they weren't to anyone else except maybe the buyer for the store. And pantyhose, well those were a relationship sore spot. On the way to my high school graduation we had to stop at KMART because "Stephanie, every other girl will have on pantyhose. This is a dressy occasion" Regardless of the fact that I pointed out that you couldn't see my legs under my robe, we still stopped. I made sure to point out every girl (and by every I mean 99/100 girls walking into graduation) that did not have on pantyhose. At my college graduation, she merely questioned me. "Stephanie, are you going to wear pantyhose with that dress?" I just gave her a look that answered her question. By PT school graduation, I just saw her look at my legs. She never asked. 

Fast forward a couple years later and we are in Dress Barn. My mom insists that I buy this jacket. I argued and argued, but she went as far as to buy the jacket for me. I never wore it. They were not really in style anymore as far as I could tell. I hung it up in the back of my closet and that is were it stayed. Through the past 2 moves even. I go through my closet periodically to pull out stuff to donate. For some reason I have never gotten rid of it. I guess for whatever reason I kept it after she died because it was a reminder of who my mom really was. In the past year though, I have tried it on a couple times. It still fits. And... my mom was right. Jean jackets aren't out of style after all :-) 

I thought about all this on Mother's Day. I know that my mom isn't here to find out all the things I understand about her now. She won't know all the things that I can admit now that she was right about. Or will she. She probably knew all along. And, one day I will realize watching my boys that they knew I was right about one thing or another, even though they will NEVER admit it.

Line Up Your Daughters, We're Raising a Family Man

This past week we have been digging around the house looking for stuff to sell in the neighborhood garage sale this weekend. Of course, any time you do this you find lots of old stuff. For me, I found my tub of stuffed animals and baby dolls that are meaningful for one reason or another. Obviously, the meaning decreases each year I realize that they have been sitting in the attic. It is unlikely that my 2 boys have any real attachment to stuffed animals from my childhood when they are selective about which ones they currently have that they will play with. Also of note, each time I open this container, the amount of stuff I save decreases.

Sunday afternoon I found this container. I opened it and realized quickly that they all smelled pretty awful. Between the musky smell from being put up and the smoky smell they got from being in my house growing up, you can barely breathe when you open it. Yet another reason I become less attached. This time though I thought I might try to wash them. Then I will know if they are salvageable, and if so, which ones would be good to put in the garage sale. This is one of the larger Tupperware style tubs and probably holds 10-15 items. (This is a drastic improvement from the 2-3 tubs full that I had when I moved away to college). First load...success. They all smell great. I washed the second, and they were left in the dryer. Alone in the tub at the end... my newborn baby doll. She is entirely plastic, so I figured she'd require a hand bath and I had yet to find the energy for that.

Today I stayed home from work with Grayson, who was out of school to use up an extra snow day they didn't use this year. Why they didn't just take off a day at the end of the year, no idea. So we started off at the dentist, ran a few errands, then picked up Braxton and came home early. Braxton found my tub, and thus my baby doll. Braxton absolutely adores our friends baby, Braden. He even looks for Braden's car seat in the hall at daycare where they all get lined up. If he sees it, he wants to see Braden. If he doesn't, he wants to know where he is.

So I'm cleaning up the kitchen and I hear him rambling about Baby Brother tired. Baby Brother is also a girl, apparently the anatomical difference was lost on both of my boys as the afternoon went on. ...baby brother was also likely cold as his clothes were in the dryer.

Next thing I hear... Braxton dragging out his pillow and a washcloth. He puts  baby face down on the couch and starts patting his back.

Then of course, my TV is too loud, so Grayson applied some headphones to drown out the noise. I ended up explaining that if we would just put baby in another room, the TV wouldn't bother him.... so they did. And they insisted I find baby some clothes, and turn on Braxton's lullaby CD. Oh, and set a timer so that baby won't sleep more than 10 minutes for a nap. (Any real parent knows that 10 minutes is only enough time to think about what you might do while baby is asleep, not actually accomplish anything)

Other items on the counter ready for garage sale, unused baby bottles. Can you guess where that leads... luckily Braxton allowed me to replace the requested "baby milk" with water.

 
 

Baby Brother cries a lot apparently. He also needs a Paci. Braxton retrieved a paci from the drawer and had me squeeze it in baby's mouth. This is actually quite impressive since Braxton is a paci addict. He only gets his paci at night to fall asleep, but if he happens to get a hold of one during the day.... he'll sneak every moment he can before you catch him.

Time for another nap. Yep, face down on the chair.

But Baby Brother was cold, so we had to drag out every blanket, and the cover for the changing table to keep him warm.

Dinner time at the Weems's house... you bet! This newborn is talented. He can sit up at the table!

Bedtime. As a good parent, I dug around Braxton's bedroom and found his newborn night gown. Baby Brother is ready for bed.

Face Down of course. This baby is bound to be a SIDS statistic.

Now, at some point in all this, Dad comes home from work. I've texted him a couple of pictures. He has never been one to discourage his children from stuff typically reserved for girls, except possibly clothes. He seemed to find the situation amusing. He even went as far as to try to figure out how to keep the bottle from leaking any water while they were feeding Baby Brother. I did at sometime overhear the following while making dinner.

"If you don't leave baby alone for a while, he is going to be really tired"

I'm not sure if Dad was concerned for baby's well being, or was just not sure how much he could take of his sons' including the baby in their daily playtime routine. I did sense a little frustration when he stepped in water coming into the kitchen where the boys had stripped baby down to give him a bath ... with a washcloth and toothbrush. (Hey, at least the boys wanted the baby to be clean right??)

Now come on my mom friends.... which ones of you are slightly excited to see Braxton working on his parenting skills already??  It's not girly for him to have a doll and play house. It just means he is watching some great family dynamics (job sharing) at home and is copying them. We are really raising a true family man! .... now if I can just get dad to model getting his clothes to the laundry hamper, daily dishes, and laundry duty. Then Braxton will be a real keeper!!

Sneaky Story Telling

Yesterday was Easter. Everyone was up late coloring eggs and playing... running in circles through the house... Grayson, Braxton, and our friend Noah had a great time! I'm fairly certain that when we designed the open floor house that we live in.... we were not entirely in understanding of what great fun this layout provides for preschoolers!! 

Grayson is in a phase where he is scared to go sleep alone. He has quite the imagination so I am sure that this is partly to blame. He is afraid of the dark, afraid of his room, afraid of shadows... you name it. I suppose that this follows all the stuff I've read about having a vivid imagination that just won't shut off for bedtime. So the night before Easter, we suggested that he could camp out on Braxton's bedroom floor. He ended up waking up in the middle of the night and moved camp to our bedroom floor. I for one was excited about the Easter Bunny's visit to our house so I tried to not be too quiet as I started getting ready for church. Eventually Grayson got up and I caught him wandering out into the living room in search of his Easter Basket. He was very excited.... especially when he saw his sand bucket.

"MOM!! The Easter Bunny knew EXACTLY which toy I wanted!!!"

This was fantastic news considering he had seen this bucket several weeks ago at SAMs and nearly had a fit because we didn't buy it for him. Guess its a good thing the Easter Bunny loves him ;-)

Later that day the boys were playing outside and "Aunt Missy" was outside bathing Chester. When I went outside I was summoned over to her. This is pretty close to how this conversation went...

Lyssa: Did you tell Grayson that he can help me?
Me: No, but he can.
Lyssa: Well I didn't think so. He wanted to help and I asked him if he asked you.
    (this is a rough translation of their conversation)
      Grayson: Yes, she said I could
      Lyssa: Did she tell you that you could, or are you just saying that she did?
      Grayson: She told me I could, but don't tell her that she told me.

So from this conversation, we can deduct that 
1) Grayson is sneaky (I believe I used to get called this by my mom... I'm sure she smiles when she hears his tall tales and how sneaky he is... )
2) My sister has picked up some parenting intuition while being here with the boys.

I'm sure that the boys will be heartbroken when Missy moves out, but I'm sure she'll stop by to babysit... I mean eat dinner ;-) Perhaps we can start a routine "date night" with Aunt Missy for the boys.

REJECTED

I knew this day would come. I knew it. Mom can't ALWAYS be the most important person. I have tried to prepare myself for this day, but geez. He just turned 5. Five. That is it. Five years old... and he rejected me. Not for Dad. This has already happened and is sometimes a blessing when I'm exhausted.... He rejected me for his friends.

I went to Holy Souls Wednesday morning for his Easter Egg Hunt/ Easter Lunch. I got there early because I had signed up to help walk the class down the street to the neighborhood park. Grayson was excited to see me. He always runs up to the classroom door to open it. (The doors are locked from the outside and open to the parking lot so he always sees me coming. When we walked to the park he stayed by me and we walked there talking to his little buddies. He easily put himself in line on the curb with the rest of his class. This in itself is a big step for Grayson over the last year. In the past he would have clung to me and not wanted to go sit there unless I went with him. Grayson ran away as fast as his new shoes would take him (remember, the new ones are always faster than the old ones he tells me) and quickly found his 12 eggs he was allowed. Then he joined the other kids on the playground. He would yell for me to watch him on the slide or to watch him slide down the fireman-like pole. It was pretty fun to watch them... and to save the ones that climbed a little too high and were stranded.

What Grayson may have forgotten, was that now I have seen him use the fireman's pole. He can longer pretend like he can't do this and ask for help. Based on his performance, I am convinced that he has been able to do this for a while, but was pretending like he couldn't so that he could get some attention.

After about an hour, it was time to line up to go back to school. He got in line and walked beside me for about 1/4 of the way there. He even held my hand for about 200 feet. Then he lets go. "Mom, I don't want to hold your hand anymore" And then.... he ran ahead. Just left me. I think had another mom not been walking next to me and talking, I might have been so stunned that I would have stopped walking all together. The only time I got close to him again before we got back was when his small group had gotten far enough behind from the teacher and a couple other kids that I had to run ahead to keep them from crossing the street without looking. (Which of course there was a truck coming so my heart was racing a bit).

After we got back to class it was lunchtime. They had planned to eat at the park, but it was pretty chilly so they decided to go back to the classroom. I parked myself at Grayson's table and helped all the kids at the table get their lunches opened and assembled. This also gave me an opportunity to scope out what the other kids bring. I'm not very creative with making lunches so Grayson gets Lunchables a lot. I always wanted Lunchables when I was growing up, but they were too expensive. Grayson definitely has a luxury with this. He just doesn't know it. I do occasionally try to change up his lunch so it is healthier, but it often comes home nearly as full as it left. I have decided that I will just keep sending a healthy side (fruit, etc) with his Lunchable for now :-)  After several minutes it was just me and one other dad left with the eating kids. I was in no hurry since it was my off day for work. Then it happened again.

Grayson: " Mom, you can go now"
Me: "Um, okay then. Love you. Have a fun afternoon!"

So I kissed his head (luckily he isn't too big for a hug and small kiss yet, but I'm sure it's next) and left. Then I immediately called Dusty to tell him I was rejected. I was joking about it and proud that he was growing up enough to not need me all the time.... but I think there was just that one little piece of my heart that broke. I'm sure that won't be a first either.

"Spring" Soccer

Today was Grayson's first soccer game of the spring season. That being said, I have decided that we should have waited until Spring to actually have a spring season. As mentioned previously, last Wednesday Grayson had "skills and drills"... and it was FREEZING. So Friday night we eat out so we can run around town looking for some winter gear for Grayson to wear with his "Spring" Soccer uniform. Shorts and a jersey didn't sound warm enough when game time temperature is cold enough for snow. Yep, we had snow during the game. We started at Academy, thinking it would be our best bet, we found an Under Armour shirt and some hand warmers. Grand Total: $46 plus tax. Ouch. I know that stuff is expensive, but he is 4. He won't wear that shirt in a couple weeks, and then by next cold weather season, he will have outgrown it. So at 8:15 we head to Target, hoping to find something for under his wind pants. They of course didn't have this, but they did have a less popular brand of "under armour". We bought this on clearance for $10. Guess who will be heading back to academy with her receipt later this week :-)

After our experience of being under dressed earlier this week, we were not about to be the coldest parents on the field. We bought the hand warmers for pockets, and Dusty, in his efforts to find something for under Grayson's pants, purchased 2 pairs of thermal underwear bottoms. I have never shopped for or worn those... and I'm guessing that he didn't bother to see if they made them in a girls version.... so he proudly shows off the pair he bought me... obviously they are designed for men. As far as I know there are zero uses for the front opening on the pants he got for me. Especially since they are not made for short girls... the opening lines up with about my mid stomach. They probably could latch on to the bottom of my bra line, but I tried them on to see if they would work. They fit okay I suppose, considering nobody will see them... and by nobody I mean NOBODY. Not even Dusty. He seemed a little offended that when I tried them on, I took them off before coming back out of the bathroom. Not exactly sure why he thought that would be a cute sight. And he knows better than to laugh about how they look considering he bought MENS stuff for me. Despite them being absolutely ridiculous looking on me, I did wear them under my jeans. And they managed to keep me completely comfortable when paired with my winter coat, hat, and gloves. Glad to say that nobody noticed that I had them on and that they were rolled down and covered the top of my jeans. Ten years ago I never would have told this story, but as I've gotten older I've decided that its much for fun to share all the silly stuff than to be embarrassed.

As for the soccer, it was entertaining. Whats not to be entertaining about several 4 and 5 year olds running around, especially at game one when some kids wore the wrong jersey color and so it was difficulty to keep up with who was on your team. At one point today I heard a kid yell at Grayson "I'm on your team!!!" Kind made me laugh. At least he knows to try to get the ball and kick it towards his goal!